LENT
5-A
9 March AD 2008
Marks of A Disciple: Spiritual Friendships
Part five in a series
Disciples
of Jesus have friends who are also disciples. Did it ever occur
to you why the apostles were sent out in pairs? For companionship,
certainly. But our Lord sent them out two by two for safety and
support, and to keep Satan from having a field day with their
lives. I place before you today the issue of spiritual friendships.
This concept may sound a little foreign compared to something
like Bible reading or prayer. Prayer is something that disciples
do and that we pretty much expect it. So, too, are worship and
service. But forming spiritual friend-ships may be new to your
ears. You may already be part of a spiritual friendship and just
never labeled it as such. Until I saw it in a list of identifying
marks of a disciple I gave it very little thought.
The Missouri
Synod from its inception in 1847 has had in place a monthly meeting
of the pastors in each circuit. We don't take this meeting lightly;
I am supposed to notify my Circuit Counselor if I cannot make
it and explain to him why. If I miss too many he's going to visit
me. At these meetings the brothers discuss matters of importance
to our congregations; more importantly this is the time in which
we care for each other, advise one another, and pray for each
other's needs.
Experience
has shown that when a Christian is isolated and left alone he
(or she) is left wide open to the assaults of the devil. Once
or twice a year, our Delaware Valley Circuit tries to meet socially
for the sake of our wives. They need the fellowship and support
of their peers. It's not easy being a pastor's wife.
We meet as
peers, professional colleagues, because we're supposed to; over
time we become friends. Aside from the ministry many of us have
little in common. Some of us like golf. We are a diverse lot just
like your circles of friends. We grow up in different parts of
the nation and we went to different schools and we have various
political points of view. But we are thrown together in the work
of the ministry. Our common bond is a love for the Savior, Christ
Jesus. God parades many people through our lives; and either they
bless us or we must bless them. Through all of these relationships,
casual or formal, we grow according to the will of God.
Value and
give thanks for all your friends. But prayerfully consider cultivating
a
spiritual friendship or two. I'm thinking that forming a spiritual
friendship or
partnership happens more readily for women than men because women
have an
easier time making friends. Ladies naturally seem to open up and
network. Their verbal skills are more developed than men's. (If
I've said something not PC, I'm available for flogging after church.)
But I do know that men don't find it easy to talk about personal
things. I'd rather put worms on fishhooks or eat eggplant than
talk about my feelings and the things I'd only acknowledge to
God in prayer. However:
1. Spiritual
friends strengthen and support each another. In the Old Testa-ment,
in Daniel 3, there is the story of three young men: Shadrach,
Meshach and Abednego. These Jewish boys courageously stood together
against a tyrant king and idolatry in a foreign land. Who knows
whether by themselves any of these heroes would have had the courage?
Together they stood strong. God blessed their friendship as they
faced martyrdom in the fiery furnace. Yes, God blessed them as
stood for God and for their Faith. Not only did the Almighty preserve
them from death, but they won for him a place of honor in pagan
Babylon.
2. Spiritual
friends are prayer partners, partners in mission. Paul writes
in some detail about his partnership with the Philippian Christians.
"I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, always in every
prayer of mine for you all, making my prayer with joy, because
of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now."
(Phil. 1:3-5) He doesn't use that word with any other group of
Christians. Paul's relationship with the Philippian church seems
to be especially close. He counts on their prayers, and he looks
forward to a time when they can see each other again in the flesh,
he reveals his heart in this letter.
Paul speaks
tenderly to these people, so unlike his tone with the Corinthians.
He asks the Philippians for a personal favor (as he writes from
prison-imprisoned for sharing God's love in Jesus), all he needs
is for them to complete his joy. He wants to know that their love
is growing along with their faith. " So [I can derive] any
encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation
in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by
being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord
and of one mind." (Phil. 2:1-2) At a time when St. Paul might
have been self-absorbed with his own suffering, his concern is
for their well being, he asks "Euodia and Syntyche to put
aside their differences. Please help them, for they worked side
by side with me in the work of the gospel along with Clement..."
(4:2)
3. Spiritual
friends share insight which the Spirit reveals to them. They help
each to see what sometimes you cannot see yourself, the hand of
God in daily life. "Don't worry about me" Paul writes
to the Philippians, "for what has happened to me has really
served to advance the gospel... my imprisonment is for Christ...
and most of the brethren have been made confident in the Lord
because [of it], and are much more bold to speak the Word of God
without fear." (1:12-13)
4. Disciples
have friends who are also disciples of Christ; brothers and sisters
with whom they can sympathize, who understand the burdens associated
with carrying the cross. I don't want you to go home thinking
that the only friends you may have must be fellow Christians.
That actually sounds (to me) somewhat cultish. (Cults make you
disassociate from family and friends who don't share the views
and the values of the group.)
There are
Christians, however, who think that's the way it should be, and
they can go to Paul for that. The great apostle warns about the
inherent dangers of personal relationships with those whose faith
and morals, etc., are alien to ours. "Do not be unequally
yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness
with lawlessness? Or, what fellowship has light with darkness?"
(2 Cor. 6:14) And again, he says, "Do not be deceived: "Bad
company ruins good morals." 1 Cor. 15:33 (That's Paul's version
of one apple spoils the whole bushel.)
Paul has
a point. Secular friends have a way of pulling us away from God,
either intentionally or unintentionally. It's happening all across
the nation. They don't mind partying late the night before it's
your turn to teach Sunday school. They may not have any guiding
principles about the immoderate use of alcohol or other substances,
to say nothing about sex. It's not that they are bad people, it's
just that their conscience is not formed; theirs is not the mind
of Christ.
Before you
adopt any one of your friends as a spiritual partner, be sure
that both of you are in the same place. Make sure he or she is
one with whom you can pray, and work. That person must be Christian.
He or she will need heart surgery, along the lines of Psalm 51:10:
"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right
spirit within me..." To put it in the words of Jesus, "you
must be born again (born from above)."
5. Spiritual
friends help and support each other by holding their partner accountable
for spiritual growth. A good reading of Acts shows Paul being
very careful not to tread on the toes of Jesus' original apostles.
God revealed the Gospel to Paul the Gospel, it was not mediated
through the Twelve. And while Paul may have wanted to start preaching
the Good News immediately, he went slowly at first so as not offend
the Mother Church in Jerusalem. He needed their support and they
needed his. The Jewish Church and the Gentile Church went forward
very carefully and very deliberately-holding each other accountable
for the story of Jesus and the growth of their enterprise. These
two branches of the one holy Church were quite different from
each other but they would work hand in hand, each in their own
sphere, for the common good.
6. Disciples
of Jesus Christ should work at building and maintaining spiritual
friendships. Let's face it, no one likes to come to church by
themselves. The kids make no bones about it, they want to sit
with their friends; and adults are no different. Bring your friend
to church, or offer to meet them in the narthex. We all know someone
who's been meaning to get back to worship, but just can't manage
to break the ice.
Offer to
pray for them. Invite them often. Statistics suggest that your
buddy needs to be asked six to seven times before he'll say yes.
Most of us quit after the second time: some friends we are. Disciples
invite their friends to church. They share the good news of Jesus
because his is the life that is bubbling within you and spilling
over into the lives of others. Yes, disciples of Jesus work at
maintaining relation-ships that will last forever.
Nothing is going to change tomorrow. But consider cultivating
relationships with other Christians, find ways to share your faith
others and enrich your own life in the process. Do it for them,
do it for yourself. Do it for your life in Christ.
In the name
of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen
Prince of Peace Lutheran Church
Hamburg, NJ 07419
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